I used to like mornings. I still do occasionally. If I’m able to get up early, go on a run with my friends, and come home and have a cup of coffee all before I hear the pitter-patter of little feet, mornings can be nice. The comfort of a morning routine mixed with snuggly hugs, and little boy warmth can be a great start to any day. But, lately, it’s been winter. Cold. Icy. Stagnant. And that’s just me. The weather has been cold, too, and that means running isn’t an option.
Yesterday morning was especially rough. The plan was that Jon was going to take our youngest, Greyson, to the babysitter on his way to work, which meant I had to physically remove Greyson from his warm, cozy bed. Meanwhile, he’s wailing, “I juuuuust want to staaaaay asleeeeep in my buuuuunk!” I took him downstairs, laid him on the couch and listened to him cry. I wanted to lay down beside him and go back to sleep, but there was too much that needed to be done.
I got the older boys their breakfast and was finally able to coax Greyson from the couch by telling him I needed help getting Conner’s toast out of the toaster. He loves that job. However, it doesn’t last all that long and then he was back to whining. He wanted cereal, but he didn’t want to sit in a chair. So, he laid down on the counter and ate his cereal while on his belly. Because I stopped caring.
I made Conner’s lunch, said goodbye to Jon and Greyson as they headed out the door, and started getting Rylan ready for his day at preschool. After Conner got on the bus and Rylan was ready for the day, it was my turn to shower and make myself presentable. 30 minutes later, I got Rylan on the bus and I realized I forgot to give Conner his morning dose of antibiotic. “No big deal,” I thought. “I can drop it off at the school on my way to work. I actually have a little time to spare.”
I grabbed my bag, headed toward the door and grabbed my keys…except my keys weren’t where they were supposed to be. So, I looked in my coat pockets, dug through my purse…looked through Jon’s desk. I’m notorious for losing things and I was dreading having to tell Jon that I couldn’t find the keys, so I turned the house upside down. I went out to the car, thinking I left them in the ignition. Nothing. Finally, I needed to call Jon. No answer. I sent him a text. Nothing. I started sending messages in all caps: “WHERE ARE YOU? WHERE ARE THE CAR KEYS?!” No response.
Meanwhile, it’s now 8:45, my training starts at 9, and it takes me 20 minutes to get there. I turn the corner and head straight into panic. I call the hospital where Jon works and ask for the IT department. An irritatingly calm voice answers stating that I have reached the IT Department. I asked for Jon and the nice, calm man said, “Let me see if I can reach him…” As he looked up his extension, I stated in a nice, calm voice, “Please find him soon because I CAN’T FIND MY KEYS!” He may have giggled. I may have sworn at him in my head.
I finally got through to Jon’s coworker. “John, this is Kim. I need to find my husband because I CAN’T FIND MY KEYS AND I’M LATE FOR WORK.” John had the good sense not to giggle and he calmly said, “He’s standing here in front of me. I’ll hand him the phone while you take a deep breath.”
Me: “Honey, I can’t find the car keys. Do you have any idea where they are?”
Jon: “Oh dear. They’re in my pocket.”
Things after that point are a little fuzzy. What I do know is that I had to borrow our neighbor’s van in order to get to work. What would the world be without neighbors helping neighbors? Angry. The world would be angry.
I finally made it to my training. I was the imbecile who walked in late at 9:15. They had to pass all of the materials to the back of the room where I was able to find a chair. I sat down, took a deep breath, and looked over the agenda to see what I had missed. Then, to my surprise, I learned that the training actually started at 8am, not 9am. Isn’t that HILARIOUS?! [Insert hand slapping forehead *here.*]
For the record, Jon never does stuff like that. He’s a picture of responsibility and dependability. He felt terrible…and perhaps a little concerned that his wife was going off the deep end. But, then he remembered who he married and that on the edge of the deep end is where she typically lives…unless she can go on a run. Then the world makes sense to everyone again. That’s why he is going to buy me this shirt:
Here’s hoping your morning was better than mine! Happy weekend!